Nobody Likes Onions is the brainchild of Patrick -- guests and hosts have joined and left the program, but Patrick has remained through it all. In addition to acting as host and moderator of the show, Patrick handles most of the production of NLO as well. Indeed, Patrick has participated in every episode, except for the infamous 'Adam and Nick' shows.

A professional stand-up comedian based in Tampa Bay, Florida, Patrick controls the mood and direction of each show. While providing a humorous commentary on his life and surroundings on the program, Patrick employs of a range of comedic styles and voices. Sometimes he will be outwardly silly, nonsensical or absurd, breaking into character or song. Sometimes he will be detached and ironic, as when he instructed his fans to kill themselves and mention NLO in their suicide notes. Other times, he can acerbic, critical and confrontational, engaging in rants about popular culture and current events. Whatever the technique, Patrick's humor -- and by extension the program itself -- are rooted in the philosophy that nothing is off-limits in comedy.

He is occasionally known as "Type 2 Patrick", referring to his diagnosis of Type 2 Diabetes. This nickname was the namesake for Type 2 Records. Patrick has released a few songs that he has created, such as Podslaughter, under this label of Type 2 Records.

In Episode 156, Patrick gave himself the nickname The Soc because, as he says, he is a socialite. While not in frequent use, it still endures. Among NLO fans, there is a Texas hold 'em poker hand, K9, that has been dubbed 'The Soc.'

In 2001 Patrick graduated from the University of South Florida with a degree in Information Systems Management. He then obtained his Master's in Business Administration with a focus in Decision Sciences and Marketing. Patrick's business background can be best heard on the show during entrepreneurial segments where he discusses his many ideas for new products, websites and recipes. A typical example of one of Patrick's business ideas is Prime Cuts, a restaurant the serves steaks and gives its clientele haircuts, and an example of Patrick's recipes ideas is the macoroni and cheese quesadilla. Occasionally, Patrick's experience and education manifests during higher-level business conversations, such as in his interview with Shirley Phelps-Roper in Episode 083 where he discusses the marketing of the Westboro Baptist Church with her. Other examples are in some politically themed discussions. It is not uncommon to hear Patrick say that it is the job of a company to maximize shareholders' wealth.

Contact Patrick via email at patrick@nobodylikesonions.com.

Memorable Quotes

"(watching Japanese porn) She has a cross necklace on, evidently she's a Christian.... ooh, hmm, I dunno honey, what would Jesus do? Oh, evidently climb off and start sucking her vagina juices off his dick."

"Faaaaantastic."

"Banned from the show."

“A lot of people don’t know this…France’s #1 export – WHITE FLAGS.”

“A dried-out black baby makes for some damn good jerky.”

"I'm involved in a major motion picture film project."

"Jesus is the Katrina of my heart!"

"Eh...The Soc!"

"Learn things."

"ON YOUR FACE!"

"Kill yourself!"